Mothers: The True Architects of Holy Families and Societies

When we talk about women, who springs most to mind? For many, if not all; it is undoubtedly their mothers, and they are absolutely right. Some might think of their sisters, partners, close relatives, friends, or those who have played a major role in their lives. It is therefore with great pleasure and deep gratitude that we appreciate women for all the roles they play in society especially in the upbringing of children. There is even a saying:  "Women are the real architects of society or the nation." 

They are the first teachers of faith, morals, and discipline; they impart the best life lessons to their children, the core values upon which families, societies, and nations build and develop.

However, this noble calling does not come without significant challenges. Women, both in the past and today, face immense difficulties: mistreatment, inequality, domestic violence, and every form of discrimination imaginable. As a result, many women grow up never experiencing true love; they are deeply hurt and struggle to appreciate the beauty of living in a loving home. This affects their marital lives, their ability to raise children well, and their care for their households. We see this in heartbreaking realities, such as increased cases of child neglect, mothers who abandon newborns, or worse, commit infanticide or abortion simply because they themselves were not raised to understand that every child deserves life, love and care. Many have grown up without knowing God; their faith is lacking, even though they are the very first ones called to draw their children closer to God, to teach them the basics of the faith (catechesis), and to lead them in prayer.

Sadly, the cycle of hurt often extends beyond biological mothers. Some people: due to painful past experiences do not want to be associated with women at all. They carry deep inner wounds in their souls that traumatize them for life, making it hard to trust, open up, or show love to others because all they have known is pain and mistreatment. This is especially true for children raised by stepmothers, aunts, or close family members who showed favoritism, discrimination, and cruelty. In some homes, stepchildren face harsh punishments, inequality, and a complete lack of love or care. They are forced to eat scraps or beans while others enjoy meat and good food; they are overworked with endless chores, beaten regularly, denied proper clothes, and deprived of basic needs and even small wants. This favoritism often extends only to biological children or those in the direct family lineage, treating others as outsiders unworthy of equal care.

The same can happen with house helps or domestic workers brought into the home to assist with chores. How do we treat them? Do we see them as family members deserving of respect, fair treatment, rest, good food, and kindness, or as mere strangers we can ignore or exploit? We are never meant to discriminate against or segregate them; instead, we should treat them as we would wish to be treated, with the dignity of children of God. The Bible reminds us that true religion involves caring for the vulnerable, "Religion that is pure and undefiled before God and the Father is this: to care for orphans and widows in their affliction..." (James 1:27 NABRE) and not wronging the defenseless (Exodus 22:21-23 NABRE). All who have endured such harsh treatment carry lasting scars that hinder their ability to love freely. Let's eradicate this vice entirely. Be good mothers not only to our biological children but to all children, stepchildren, nieces, nephews, and those in our care, like the house help who becomes part of the household. Extend the love of a true mother to everyone God places in our path, healing wounds and breaking the cycle of hurt.

Think of models like St. Monica, a powerful example for mothers today. For 17 years, she never ceased praying for her wayward husband and her son: who later converted and became the great St. Augustine. How many women in our current generation would dedicate 17 years of persistent prayer for the conversion and well-being of their families? Many would give up far sooner.

Another inspiring example is Hannah, the mother of Samuel. She was a barren woman, mocked, ridiculed, discriminated against, and abused by others because of her condition as we read from the book of (1 Samuel 1:1–10). Yet this did not deter her from faithfully and persistently crying out to God for a child. She even vowed to dedicate the child to the Lord if her prayers were answered and God heard her (1 Samuel 1:11–20 NABRE). It is not easy to become a laughingstock and then, once blessed with the longed-for child, to give that only son back to God in service at the temple (1 Samuel 1:24–28 NABRE). This is the kind of selfless upbringing we desire from parents. Above all the material provision, such as sending children to expensive schools; the most valuable and important task a woman undertakes is teaching her children faith, how to pray, and how to love God. That is the heart of it all. Parents are "God on earth" to their children; through women, procreation continues, and they are called to mold us into God-fearing, loving, and responsible people.

That is why, when a child misbehaves, people often say, "You are like your mother" because society knows well that mothers are the primary educators of children. Charity begins at home, and mothers are meant to guide their kids along the path that brings pride to the family name.

The greatest role model of all is the Blessed Virgin Mary. Consider the Holy Family of Nazareth: Jesus, Mary, and Joseph. Mary, daughter of Joachim and Anne, was conceived without sin; God prepared her as the Ark of the Covenant to bear Christ, the salvation of mankind. From her youth, she was dedicated to God, spending much of her time in service at the temple before being betrothed to Joseph. Her parents taught her faith, humility, discipline, and respect above everything else. Do you think God would have chosen just any ordinary woman to bear His Son? Certainly not, He chose a modest, holy woman.

At the Annunciation, when the angel Gabriel announced that she would conceive the Christ without knowing any man, Mary was greatly troubled and pondered the greeting (Luke 1:26–29 NABRE). Yet she willingly said, "Behold, I am the handmaid of the Lord. May it be done to me according to your word" (Luke 1:38 NABRE). Had she not known and loved God deeply, would she have accepted? Without her "fiat," we would not have our Savior.

From His birth to His death on the cross, Mary never left Jesus' side. They fled to Egypt to protect Him; she tended to the young Jesus, providing all He needed. She presented Him in the temple, dedicating Him to the Father even though He was God Himself. This is a lesson for all mothers today: Bring your children close to God before teaching them video games or other distractions: teach them to pray and love God first.

All the lessons Jesus learned as a child came through Mary and Joseph. While Joseph worked in his carpentry shop, Mary often remained at home with Jesus, instilling discipline and love for God. Even at Cana, she was there, interceding and never abandoning her Son. She followed Him through His public ministry, listening and caring for Him. The hardest moment came on Good Friday: walking the streets of Jerusalem to Calvary, hearing false accusations against her innocent Son, witnessing His scourging, crucifixion, and death for the sake of humanity. This sorrow is beautifully captured in the Seven Sorrows of Mary: seeing her Son beaten, stripped, nailed to the cross, and finally holding His lifeless body after the descent from the cross. Despite the unbearable pain, she stayed by Him to the end, even at His burial. Brokenhearted yet faithful, she remained.

Even after the Ascension and at Pentecost, Mary was present with the apostles, comforting and strengthening them in their fear. Who is a better mother than this? Is she not worthy of honor by all?

Let us take her as our model especially women of this age. Let us pray and invoke her intercession. May we learn from her modesty, love, and parenting. Let us imitate her life to build "Nazareth families" in our homes, small holy families in our households and societies.

A society without women is doomed to non-existence and worthlessness. Mothers are the core of our families and societies, let us always honor and love them; starting by nurturing and grooming girl children from a tender age.

Happy International Women's Day!